Top 45 Crooked Quotes

Nixon was so crooked that he needed servants to help him screw his pants on every morning.

With great difficulty, I persuaded my dentist to saw one of my teeth level with the others. He thought it might kill the tooth, but it didn’t. I wanted it done because I was doing a lot of television with food and I saw myself eating with these horrible crooked teeth.

I’m not handsome in the classical sense. The eyes droop, the mouth is crooked, the teeth aren’t straight, the voice sounds like a Mafioso pallbearer, but somehow it all works.

I’ve always felt if my nose were more crooked, critics would focus more on my acting.

I remember Nazi election propaganda posters showing a hateful Jewish face with crooked nose.

I have crooked toes from wearing boots that didn’t fit me because that’s all I could afford as a kid.

The glories of our blood and state, Are shadows, not substantial things; There is no armour against fate, Death lays his icy hand on kings. Scepter and crown must tumble down, And, in the dust, be equal made With the poor crooked scythe and spade.

When my daughter Sabrina was 2 years old, the pediatrician told me it was time she quit using a pacifier because that could make her teeth crooked and even cause infections in her ears.

Kids don’t have ruts yet that adults have carved into their minds. They’re born logical. Crooked thinking has to be taught.

Out of timber so crooked as that from which man is made nothing entirely straight can be carved.

So many times I’ve wanted to crack up, standing there stiff while seven women are crawling round my toes fixing hems and the designer’s having a freak-out because the denim cuffs are crooked. I’m on the verge of hysteria.

We got dragged through a system and got burned by crooked lawyers, and the list goes on and on.

It is clear I was never the Pretty Girl. I had my two front teeth knocked out when I was 10 and didn’t fix them until I was 19. I have a crooked smile and a nose that looks like it’s been broken 12 times but never has been. My nose was always red, so people called me Rudolph. My whole face is off-center.

May your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view. May your mountains rise into and above the clouds.

Hockey wasn’t invented but discovered. The game, and the large organizing idea behind Stephen Smith’s deeply personal ‘Puckstruck,’ sleeps in ponds and in the crooked limbs of trees overhead; we merely pluck a stick from the sky and skate over the frozen world to find ourselves and each other.

Between a fellow who is stupid and honest and one who is smart and crooked, I will take the first. I won’t get much out of him, but with that other guy I can’t keep what I’ve got.

I did not come to Augusta to provide lip service. I came to work for the Maine people. I also came to Augusta to root out crooked politicians and government corruption.

I don’t like to look at myself in the mirror, which is why my eye makeup is always crooked.

As different streams having different sources all mingle their waters in the sea, so different tendencies, various though they appear, crooked or straight, all lead to God.

There is never a shortage anywhere of lawyers eager to attack the First Amendment, as though it were nothing more than a clause in a lease from a crooked slumlord.

Lawyers have to make a living, and can only do so by inducing people to believe that a straight line is crooked.

There was one player who was better than Pele. It was Garrincha. He had one leg crooked, the other one straight, normal. How did he do all those things with such difficulties? He was a paralytic! And the way he played! Much better than us all!

We live in world that wants to burnish the rough edges and straighten the crooked line, but conformity doesn’t beget greatness.

I have been offered other roles on television but I don’t think I’ll be able to enact those crooked characters.

Don’t think because I’m a positive dude, I’m going to always say something nice. If you come at me crooked, one too many times or if too many people came at me crooked too many times in a row, then they’re going to get it. I don’t always exercise that self control and I don’t regret it either.

One day, I got beat up, and my glasses, which were crooked already, got shattered on the ground. That’s when I said, ‘Okay, enough.’ I became like Batman. I decided to thug myself out, all the way.

Do not be very upright in your dealings for you would see by going to the forest that straight trees are cut down while crooked ones are left standing.

Money and corruption are ruining the land, crooked politicians betray the working man, pocketing the profits and treating us like sheep, and we’re tired of hearing promises that we know they’ll never keep.

You can’t trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it.

The English are crooked as a nation and honest as individuals. The contrary is true of the French, who are honest as a nation and crooked as individuals.

When I see this, you know, ‘Crooked Hillary,’ or I see the, ‘Lock her up,’ it’s just ridiculous. It is ridiculous. But I just – you know – it is beneath the character of the kind of dialogue we should have. Because we got real serious problems to solve. And look, most of us stopped the name-calling thing about fifth grade.

By cracking down on wage theft, we can make sure workers and taxpayers are not getting ripped off by crooked employers.

If I play a cop, it’s always a racist cop or a trigger-happy cop or a crooked cop – but by and large I play cowboys, bikers, and convicts.

No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed. I have known mothers who remake the bed after their children do it because there is wrinkle in the spread or the blanket is on crooked. This is sick.

Anybody that worries about somebody suing them, that means that they’re so crooked that they sue people, and they think people are gonna sue them.

We did not get any money from the early records. It was all taken by crooked managers. It is just a gangster’s paradise.

I’ve played different nationalities, and everything from vulnerable to strong to crooked to demented. It just increases your possibilities of work because, if people know you can do just about anything, then you’re going to get more offers. That’s what I want to do.

I look at my career as a body of work, not just Queens of the Stone Age records. I’m in Eagles of Death Metal, I’m in Them Crooked Vultures; I make records with other people.

I have really crooked teeth – they give me character!

What by a straight path cannot be reached by crooked ways is never won.

I don’t advocate any child following in their parent’s footsteps when their parent’s footsteps are as crooked as mine are.

I have had unattractive heroes – broken noses, scars, crooked teeth. You want to give them something that is human. My heroines struggle with being too short or fat or old. Some are older than the heroes. You try to cover all spectrums.

Boy, it is not fun suffering in this body of weak flesh, but Jesus is straightening out all my crooked places.

In the 74 years and nearly four months marking her time on what she called this crooked old Earth, my mother rarely drew a healthy breath. Still, to say that life wasn’t fair for this awkwardly glib, yet deeply religious woman, would fail to take into account her towering instinct for survival.

I had ordered long legs, but they never arrived. My eyes are weird too, one is gray and the other is green. I have a crooked smile and my nose looks like a ski slope. No, I would not win a Miss contest.