Top 60 Louis C. K. Quotes

Words matter. These are the best Louis C. K. Quotes, and they’re great for sharing with your friends.

I like pressure. Pressure doesn't make me crack. It's e

I like pressure. Pressure doesn’t make me crack. It’s enabling. I eat pressure, and there might be times when I get a bad feeling in my gut that this might be too much, but you feel pressure when you’re not doing something, you know?
Louis C. K.
When I was first divorced, I started dating younger women, and it was really exciting. But after a while I was like, ‘This is just dumb.’
Louis C. K.
A lot of the struggle I had with movies is I really loved moments and tones and feelings in a scene, and I loved creating those, but I never really had great stories to string them together.
Louis C. K.
There’s two kinds of press that you get when you put out a TV show: The reviews, and the people that just decide what the reviews say.
Louis C. K.
Oh, I love stand-up.
Louis C. K.
I was an awkward kid.
Louis C. K.
Gay men have to go through something to own their – who they are. They get beat up. They get ostracized. Whatever they go through, if they survive it, they come out very confident people.
Louis C. K.
Every day starts, my eyes open and I reload the program of misery. I open my eyes, remember who I am, what I’m like, and I just go, ‘Ugh’.
Louis C. K.
My kids are really easy. I often worry that they’re too easy to deal with. They’re really nice people.
Louis C. K.
When I got divorced, I thought ‘Well, there goes my act.’
Louis C. K.
Anytime you see a bit where some stranger does something to me, it’s me.
Louis C. K.
I don’t like comedy. I like funny things. I don’t like comedy. Like, comedy movies are just, ‘Oh Jesus.’
Louis C. K.
Some things I think are very conservative, or very liberal. I think when someone falls into one category for everything, I’m very suspicious. It doesn’t make sense to me that you’d have the same solution to every issue.
Louis C. K.
I’ve learned from experience that if you work harder at it, and apply more energy and time to it, and more consistency, you get a better result. It comes from the work.
Louis C. K.
Talking is always positive. That’s why I talk too much.
Louis C. K.
To me, art supplies are always okay to buy.
Louis C. K.
There’s been a lot of simple vilification of right-wing people. It’s really easy to say, ‘Well, you’re Christian, you’re anti-this and that, and I hate you.’ But to me, it’s more interesting to say, ‘What is this person like and how do they really think?’
Louis C. K.
I grew up watching all these crazy movies, European movies and stuff, and I guess that I always laughed at things that were a little more offbeat.
Louis C. K.
It’s a positive thing to talk about terrible things and make people laugh about them.
Louis C. K.
For my scale, how I grew up and live my life, I’m making plenty of money.
Louis C. K.
The thing is, comedy’s gone in a weird direction. People are really into ironic comedy and fakeness and cleverness.
Louis C. K.
When I am in a hotel, and I turn off the lights and the TV, I just freak out. I turn the TV back on and don’t get any sleep.
Louis C. K.
I would rather be with my kids than anybody else.
Louis C. K.
It’s kind of awkward to eat alone in a restaurant because everybody’s looking at me.
Louis C. K.
I think I’m past any window where I’m suddenly going to become surprisingly ripped so that people go, ‘Oh, my God, what happened to you?’
Louis C. K.
Everything that people say is testable.
Louis C. K.
To me, it’s very exhilarating when somebody else does a great thing, and it’s not me.
Louis C. K.
I’m bored’ is a useless thing to say. You live in a great, big, vast world that you’ve seen none percent of.
Louis C. K.
People get successful and they start saying, ‘Well of course I am! I was chosen! I’m special!’ No, you’re not.
Louis C. K.
I like being full, every day, with stuff that I have to do.
Louis C. K.
I definitely look at my body and I go: ‘Yuck.’
Louis C. K.
When you're a father in a marriage, you sort of become

When you’re a father in a marriage, you sort of become the mother’s assistant. And you sort of get a list from her every day and you run down the list and it feels very much like a chore.
Louis C. K.
I’m not sure why I’m so often disgusting on stage. I don’t always know where it comes from.
Louis C. K.
I think you have to try and fail, because failure gets you closer to what you’re good at.
Louis C. K.
I’m not a political comedian. That’s just not what I do.
Louis C. K.
Most people are dead. Did you know that? It’s true, out of all the people that ever were, almost all of them are dead.
Louis C. K.
I love comedians. They’re my community.
Louis C. K.
I don’t stop eating when I’m full. The meal isn’t over when I’m full. It’s over when I hate myself.
Louis C. K.
Perception is created and twisted so quickly.
Louis C. K.
Pushing the envelope’ sort of implies that you’re inside the envelope with everyone else, and you’re trying to find the edges on the outsides.
Louis C. K.
I don’t have a room full of writers pitching ideas. It’s just me out of my head.
Louis C. K.
You have to be aware of who you’re talking to in an audience.
Louis C. K.
I think one reason TV has always done well is because there is something comforting where you kind of know what you’re going to be taken through.
Louis C. K.
I could never sit down and write jokes.
Louis C. K.
Cars and cameras are the two things I let myself be materialistic about. I don’t care about other stuff.
Louis C. K.
Life is full of horrible mistakes.
Louis C. K.
It’s easier to cancel a show if it’s expensive.
Louis C. K.
I like all ladies of all different ages.
Louis C. K.
I’m enjoying the work while I get it right now.
Louis C. K.
There’s no real preparing at home for stand-up. You just go and you just do it.
Louis C. K.
Technically, I’ve learned that having good legs and wind is good for being on stage. You have to be in shape and have endurance.
Louis C. K.
A household name is like ketchup. Everybody wants ketchup. Ketchup doesn’t hurt anybody.
Louis C. K.
If I owned a network, I would never let a guy just put people on without telling me who they are.
Louis C. K.
When you’re young as a comic, you don’t have a lot of leverage.
Louis C. K.
America’s a family. We all yell at each other. It all works out.
Louis C. K.
It’s more fun to experience things when you don’t know what’s going to happen.
Louis C. K.
I’ve had soccer moms come up and tell me they can relate when I say that I want to throw my baby in the trash.
Louis C. K.
If I do something for my kids, I get a medal, because most fathers don’t.
Louis C. K.
I spend enough time onscreen looking hangdog and depressed.
Louis C. K.
I don’t think women are better than men, I think men are a lot worse than women.
Louis C. K.