Top 70 Seinfeld Quotes

Words matter. These are the best Seinfeld Quotes from famous people such as Mike Birbiglia, Bryan Fogel, David Baddiel, Engelbert Humperdinck, Sarah Silverman, and they’re great for sharing with your friends.

I listened to this interview once with Jerry Seinfeld t

I listened to this interview once with Jerry Seinfeld that really influenced my comedy and all of my writing, which is that when you’re starting out in comedy, it’s the audience that tells you what’s funny about you. And you need to listen to that and make a note of that.
Mike Birbiglia
All comedy does that. Every comedian I can think of – Larry David, Seinfeld, Mel Brooks, Chris Rock – that’s where the best comedy comes from, from stereotypes.
Bryan Fogel
I remember watching an episode of ‘Seinfeld’ in which George can’t understand why security guards can’t sit down. He gets obsessed with it and eventually buys a chair for a security guard who sits down and goes to sleep. The shop gets robbed. That’s a brilliant extrapolation of what is essentially observational comedy.
David Baddiel
I love to smile. I love to laugh. I like to hear jokes. For instance, when I’m on the road, every night I watch ‘Seinfeld.’ I find it somewhere. I think it’s so funny, and I watch the repeats over and over again.
Engelbert Humperdinck
I remember when I got a part on ‘Seinfeld’ it was like an out of body experience, I was so excited.
Sarah Silverman
Seinfeld’ was never a show in the U.K.
Russell Howard
You look at shows like The Simpsons or Larry Sanders or Curb Your Enthusiasm or Seinfeld, they’re really sophisticated shows that we all love back home.
Simon Pegg
I watched ‘The Sopranos,’ I saw a couple of episodes of ‘Mad Men.’ I loved ‘Seinfeld.’ In fact, I got some CDs of ‘Seinfeld.’ ‘Seinfeld’ was hilarious. Oh, boy. The Nazi soup kitchen? ‘No soup for you!’
Antonin Scalia
To me, in retrospect, it was amazing that ‘Seinfeld’ was a show that had such mass appeal. At first it was a disaster in the ratings, but then it became a cultural phenomenon. I don’t know if that’s possible anymore, but I don’t try for that.
Bill Lawrence
I don’t really get a chance to watch much television. I mostly watch BBC Worldwide and repeats of Seinfeld and Everybody Loves Raymond.
Will Estes
When it comes to English stand-up comedy, Indians have only seen the best – Jerry Seinfeld, Bill Cosby and the like. So, when someone claims to be an English stand-up comedian in India, he’d better be very good if he’s going to make a life of it.
Vir Das
I think if you look back at all those great comedies on television in the past, it’s all lovable losers that gathered together – ‘Taxi’ and ‘Cheers,’ ‘Seinfeld’ and ‘Friends.’
Matthew Perry
The girls in high school who watched 90210? I was watching Seinfeld.
Josh Schwartz
Just as like the music industry still wishes for the days when it controlled its own production and distribution, the media and marketing world still yearns for the silver bullet of the thirty-second spot on ‘Seinfeld,’ even as it knows those days are over.
John Battelle
I’ve been cast in a lot of comedies. I’ve done things like multi-cam sitcoms: you know, ‘Seinfeld’ type… not as good as ‘Seinfeld,’ but that kind of thing. I love that stuff.
Johnny Flynn
I grew up with ‘Friends’ from day one and, like, ‘Seinfeld’ and ‘Frazier,’ those sorts of shows, but for sure, ‘Friends’ was it for our family. Like, we would watch every Thursday night at eight o’clock; I couldn’t wait.
Kaley Cuoco
I wouldn’t call myself a standup in the presence of Jerry Seinfeld or Chris Rock, but I do my share of it and it has been and remains part of my activity and I like it.
Alan Thicke
If I’m a busboy in Philadelphia, then I have to be careful about what I say. But if I’m a public tycoon like Jerry Seinfeld, and I got a billion dollars in my pocket, he’s got to be nuts to wonder or worry about what people are going to think.
Jackie Mason
I’m not really in touch with those ‘Seinfeld’ lads except Jason Alexander.
Wayne Knight
I’m on my own when I say this, but I’m one of the few people that think that ‘Everybody Loves Raymond’ is better than ‘Seinfeld.’
Lee Mack
When the ‘Seinfeld’ show said it was going to be a show about nothing, everybody said it couldn’t – wouldn’t work. It did. ‘Thor’ is about something, about that character finding his destiny, but it’s not doing what was expected… and yet it’s doing very well.
J. Michael Straczynski
So many stars who have shows are intimidated by having people around them be funnier than them. It’s always the unsuccessful ones. Look at Seinfeld – he’s great because he let everyone be hilarious.
Paul Feig
I’m no Jerry Seinfeld. I wasn’t raised with some backyard with a creek and trees and all that.
Tracy Morgan
Shows like ‘Seinfeld’ and ‘Friends,’ they have, like, one or two damn characters throughout the whole series that are minorities.
Esai Morales
Even when I watch it, I laugh, because I think, ‘That’s me! I’m on ‘Seinfeld.”
Constance Zimmer
There’s a ‘Seinfeld’ episode, where he talks about why he can’t get angry, because his voice rises to a comedic pitch and no one takes him seriously – and that’s true of me, too.
Nish Kumar
If you go back and look at the pilot of ‘Seinfeld,’ no one would have thought that show would be what it became, and television isn’t given that kind of chance anymore.
Malik Yoba
In terms of ‘Seinfeld’, I think there’s lot of reality in a show that’s supposed to be about nothing.
Wale
Jerry Seinfeld is amazing in many ways, not the least of them his ability to find humor, and convincing us to find it, too, in the million-and-two details about modern life that under different circumstances might send us into paroxysms of rage.
Tom Shales
I always felt that it was easier to take a funny person and teach them to write television than to take somebody who was a television writer and make them funny. And I discovered a lot of great writers that went on to do a lot of great shows like ‘Seinfeld,’ ‘Friends,’ you know, ‘Three and a Half Men.’
Roseanne Barr
With the stand-up comic on TV, whether it’s Seinfeld or Cosby or Roseanne, more important than their knowledge of how to tell a joke is their knowledge of themselves, or the persona they’ve created as themselves. So that when you’re in a room with writers, you can say, ‘Guys, that’s a funny line, but I wouldn’t say it.’
Bob Newhart
If I had the gift of Jerry Seinfeld, of Bill Cosby, of

If I had the gift of Jerry Seinfeld, of Bill Cosby, of Lewis Black, these instinctively brilliant comic minds, then you go that route! But you gotta know your limitations. I’m more of an actor, more of a process guy. I did Tom Snyder, just as Danny Aykroyd did on ‘SNL.’ I did it in the club.
Joe Piscopo
Oh, yeah, I’ve seen ‘Seinfeld’ 1,000 times.
J. B. Smoove
In our first season we had a 22 rating. Today Seinfeld, a hit show, gets a 15. Lost in Space actually had a bigger audience than Star Trek got at that time.
Mark Goddard
Never met Levinson. Ever. He directed those American Express spots for us for Seinfeld, and I was off on some guest spot that I didn’t even want to do… and I got talked into doing it.
Patrick Warburton
One percent of all comics ever reach the level of a Chris Rock or a Jerry Seinfeld. When audiences come to the underground rooms, they have a chance to watch the process that happens along the way – and see the comedians grow.
Baron Vaughn
I have no illusions about having another ‘Seinfeld’ in my life.
Jason Alexander
When anyone pitches me – and I’ve heard it a million times: ‘It’s the black Seinfeld,’ or, ‘It’s the new version of something that’s already been successful’ – I immediately shut it off. I won’t ever entertain doing ‘the new version of such-and-such.’
James Lassiter
I love ‘Seinfeld.’
Andy Grammer
I mean, comedy’s hard. If you go back and look at the first season of ‘Seinfeld,’ it’s a work in progress and that’s what happens. It just takes time for people to figure each other out, and figure out timing, and to develop creatively with the writers.
Zachary Knighton
Many people don’t know our famous ‘soup kitchen’ episode on Seinfeld was inspired by an actual soup restaurant off 8th Avenue in New York.
Jason Alexander
My all-time favourite programme is ‘Seinfeld;’ I could just sit and watch that over and over again.
Gina Bellman
He’d never seen Seinfeld, so he didn’t know who Puddy was or anything.
Patrick Warburton
I learned a long time ago from when I did ‘Seinfeld’ never to take anything seriously, and to be part of the joke is the best way to show what a good sport I was.
Marlee Matlin
I’ve seen every episode of ‘Seinfeld.’
Colleen Ballinger
You could go to Estonia and there’s probably an episode of ‘Seinfeld’ playing there. Television is a very powerful thing.
Yul Vazquez
I’ve never seen ‘Seinfeld’, never seen ‘The Cosby Show’; I just don’t watch it. I saw half of ‘Oprah’ one time. I’d rather read.
August Wilson
And Seinfeld is so quick: we crank out one show a week, and the hours are very reasonable.
Julia Louis-Dreyfus
When I got my role on ‘Seinfeld,’ the show was already huge. I was so nervous on my first day. I remember meeting everyone and holding my script and just shaking.
Anna Gunn
Jerry Seinfeld made a puddle, I stepped in it, and wonderful things happened.
Jason Alexander
I don’t have much time for TV shows, but if I did, I’d watch ‘Seinfeld’ reruns.
Vonda Shepard
I can watch an episode of Jerry Seinfeld, and by the end, I’m just walking around my house, you know, talking like Jerry Seinfeld. ‘What is that? What are you doing? Who is it? What’s going’ – you know, I just had that thing, when I grew up, I’d just start talking like people. You know, I always had that.
Jimmy Fallon
I love Larry David’s take on things in ‘Seinfeld’, which is that you shouldn’t try to help people because it’ll always put you into new situations which are unpleasant.
Graham Linehan
We sold ‘Seinfeld’ all over the world but it was a very specific kind of show. In some countries it went down really well, in others they hated it.
Jerry Seinfeld
I was a rabid ‘Seinfeld’ fan. Then I did the show, and it ruined the show for me. Not that it ruined the quality of the show, but I had seen behind the curtain at Oz.
W. Earl Brown