Words matter. These are the best Ike Barinholtz Quotes, and they’re great for sharing with your friends.
My very beloved and deceased third-grade teacher, Cliff Kehod, was the one that I really remember calling me Ike a lot. It just stuck. It is a dog’s name, but I love dogs.
Alan Rickman’s Hans Gruber is the greatest bad guy in a movie ever.
You don’t want to have to come into work on Monday already apologizing. I try to save my apologies for what I’ve done later in the week.
We decided we don’t use the term ‘fat’ for me. We use the term ‘juicy’ for me. My wife’s fine with it, but the rule is when I’m over double her weight, it’s over.
I’m a huge fan of ‘Eastbound & Down.’ It’s one of my favorite shows.
I’m more scared of parking by a parking meter than vampires because one of them is real and adversely affects my life and results in a $35 fine, and one is nonsense.
Don’t be afraid to fail. You’re going to go on a million auditions, and most of them you won’t get. It’s very easy to think, ‘This is not going to work for me,’ but keep at it. It’s very generic advice, but you have to be willing to keep yourself in the game.
There’s nothing like taking two flights when you have a horrible hangover. It’s bad when people can see actual alcohol seeping out of your disgusting pores.
Out of the 72 kids that I went to high school with, I still talk to 25 of them on a fairly regular basis. Seven of my classmates live in L.A., and five of them are in the entertainment business, and we constantly talk and play fantasy football together.
I love ‘Love Actually.’ ‘Love Actually,’ there’s, like, nine stories in that movie. Three of them are good. But watching that movie, I get emotional, I get choked up, my wife makes fun of me. I don’t know if as you get older you get sappier and sentimental.
My first car was a 1999 red Mazda Protege.
I take my dog to the vet a lot because he’s old and sick, and I always step on the scale when I’m there. Let’s just say shirts that were once button-able are no longer. I’m constantly being roasted by my wife.
I feel like we’ve already seen the burger truck, we’ve seen the lobster-roll truck. There’s even healthy-food trucks now. But a big-thick-pizza truck? Come on, man. That’d be amazing.
I used to teach improv courses in Amsterdam where we would do team-building exercises, and they can go south very quickly.
I wanted to be a senator from Illinois. I was obsessed with politics. My dad was friends with a lot of local politicians, so I would hang out with them on Election Day and hand out buttons. Somehow, even though they were opposite, I loved Ronald Reagan and Bill Clinton. I thought they were the coolest guys!
Mark Wahlberg, when I was in high school, people were like, ‘You look like Marky Mark!’ Then as I got older, they were like, ‘You look like Donnie Wahlberg.’ Now they’re like, ‘You look like Donnie Wahlberg’s cousin from Massachusetts.’
The first two years I was on ‘MADtv’ were really, really fun. We always thought it was ‘Saturday Night Live’s very nice, slightly asthmatic, shorter cousin.
I do this thing at every party: I go to a party, I stand around for, like, 45 minutes, and then I turn to my wife and say, ‘I think we should go home.’ And then we leave, and then I wake up the next morning and say to my wife, ‘We don’t go out anymore.’ It’s a great trick.
My celeb crush is Julia Louis-Dreyfus. She’s hysterical, she’s beautiful, and she seems like a normal person. I’m in love with her.
