Words matter. These are the best Alan King Quotes, and they’re great for sharing with your friends.
My favorite way to spend Saturday is in and out of bed, watching sports on TV and eating.
My mother’s sister was killed in a trolley car accident, so I was raised as one of eight with my sister and six male cousins.
Let’s face it: It’s difficult enough to be funny without worrying about what is going to offend whom.
I was a high school throw-out.
Larry David finds a way to make jokes about the Holocaust. It would never have occurred to me. And it was funny.
Smoked salmon is for dinner. Belly lox is for breakfast. Don’t get that mixed up.
Museums are good things, places to look and absorb and learn.
My brother is the youngest member of the College of Physicians and Surgeons. And I wouldn’t let him cut my nails.
Age, style, where you come from, where you were born, it’s different every time, which, to me, is refreshing because it says that there isn’t any one thing, one formula or kind of character that makes a great comedian. Everybody has had a different approach.
My father helped me leave. He said, ‘It’s all out there, it’s not here.’
You only live once, except for Shirley MacLaine.
I made it, Ma – Carnegie Hall. And I didn’t have to practice.
Marriage is nature’s way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.
If you keep yourself alive and current, funny is funny.
The ability to absorb a book and make someone else’s words and story your own was exactly was I was doing on stage.
Comedy is a reflection. We create nothing. We set no styles, no standards. We’re reflections. It’s a distorted mirror in the fun house. We watch society. As society behaves, then we have the ability to make fun of it.
I won’t eat in a place that has suits of armor.
And humor has always been a weapon. You want to get even on somebody? You want to attack somebody? Make fun of them.
My son says I never tell stories about anyone who’s living.
One thing I’ve never said in my whole life is, ‘Let’s have dinner at a Japanese restaurant.’
Modesty is not one of my virtues.
I had a sympathetic role in ‘thirtysomething,’ and in two weeks I’m going to do the role again. But in the movies, I just love the heavies. It’s much more fun. Villains are a ball. People have been laughing at me for 50 years, so I love to sit in the back of the theater and listen to them hate me.
I just never saw my mother in any other room but the kitchen. There were always pots going.
Did you hear the one about the elderly Jew on his deathbed who sent for a priest, after declaring to his astonished relatives that ‘I want to convert.’ Asked why he would become a Catholic, after living all his life as a Jew, he answered: ‘Better one of them should die than one of us.’
I can’t stay friends with anyone who doesn’t have a passion for something; and, generally speaking, artistic people, creative people carry it right into the kitchen, too. They have a zest for life; the excitement of living. All of the great eaters I’ve known are also men of great wit.
