Top 33 Gag Quotes

It is rare for a joke to emerge fully formed and it is worth grafting away until it is absolutely right. Though perversely too much work, too much thought, can destroy a gag completely.

The nice thing about gag manga is how it has this aspect where, at the very least, you’re permitted to come out with anything. In my case, anything can talk. Like the mountains.

I’m not the guy to ask about politics. I’m a gag writer.

I would have been an essayist in the 18th century. Maybe I’d have had one gag in the piece, but essentially I’d be saying something.

Gag me with a spoon!

‘Animal House’ was my first movie, so I didn’t have anything to compare it to. I was a sight gag more than anything else. So I can’t say it was one of those things where your life changes. When the movie came out, I had to ask for the night off at the bar.

There is a lot of rubbish written about toilet humour – people saying it is childish and pretending it is beneath them – but there is no doubting the effectiveness of a really good willy gag.

I would like to thank the people who encouraged me to draw army cartoons at a time when the gag man’s conception of the army was one of mean ole sergeants and jeeps which jump over mountains.

Any of us in the public eye must remember: Never, ever believe your own press, and pray to develop a hypersensitive gag reflex regarding your own importance.

In America, they have this nauseating habit of calling the conductor ‘maestro’. I always slightly gag when the cor anglais player goes, ‘Maestro, can I discuss bar 19 with you?’

I don’t like sweet, warm beverages. It makes me gag!

Whenever I catch a chunk of an Adam Sandler comedy on cable, it looks as badly shot and goofily tossed off as a Jerry Lewis gag reel once he hit the late downslide with ‘Hardly Working’ and ‘Cracking Up.’

Being a talented artist is good, it’s nice, but it’s not the most important thing. I think being a good storyteller, having a good idea, a good gag, is probably more important than being a great artist.

There’s a standard pay scale for stunts. The more difficult the stunt, the more money involved. But if I’m the only stuntman who can do a particular gag, there’s usually a little more in it for me.

And there is no finer moment, when I sit in a screening, and the parents and the kids are all laughing at the same gag.

Broccoli, when overboiled, produces a sulfuric stench that causes children to gag the instant they enter the house.

Raw parsley makes me gag. It’s the same for my mum and my sister. Which is funny because apparently parsley was used to suffocate witches, back in the day.

Sometimes, you start with the drawing and then the gag comes to you in the middle of it. That is when you start working on the solution of the gag, which is composition, placing, equilibrium, and character design.

Presenting the Oscars was the most nerve-racking job I have ever done in show business. It’s very much a live show: they have comedy writers waiting in the wings, and as you come off between presentations, they hand you an appropriate gag to tell.

I honestly do feel – and I hope I don’t gag anybody if they read this – but I feel like I’m one of the luckiest people in the world.

I’m like a sight gag.

There is that stereotype of a nerd with the high pants and pocket protector and that kind of thing. That can sustain comedy for maybe a movie – hence the ‘Revenge of the Nerds’ franchise – but not for hopefully years on the air. It’s a sight gag, not a story.

I love a quick little magician gag.

I’m a sucker for gag reels and teaser trailers for new seasons. One of the great parts of panels, especially on a show like ‘Supernatural,’ which can be so dark, it’s fun to get up there and laugh and remember we’re only telling a story. Seeing Eric Kripke and Ben Edlund up there being so funny always makes me laugh.

I thought Twitter was a joke. I really thought it was a gag. I thought it was like National Lampoon or the Onion.

There are some things that I write that I know are personal in a way, or the gag is so obscure that it’s just for me, and there’s other things that could basically be for anybody or be anything, at least until the lyrics start to get written.

Right before the Bush inauguration, many women were greatly reassured when Laura said of Roe v. Wade on the ‘Today’ show, ‘No, I don’t think it should be overturned.’ Three days later, her husband reimposed the ‘global gag rule’ on groups abroad that receive U.S. funding for family planning.

If the gag is complicated, you spend more time thinking about the way you’re drawing it.

I am kind of a freak of nature who has loose joints, and I was able to put my legs behind my head, and it looked weird to people when I was a kid, so I kept doing it. It’s a great party gag.

The modern horror audience is wise to our tricks this lets it in on the gag.

A page a day means I need to focus on a gag a day, and that’s great for laughs but bad for plot, and I’m primarily a plot guy.

I have allergic reactions: it triggers my gag reflex when I read unrealistic dialogue from a teenager.

I just don’t want to live like I used to. And at some point, I’m going to put a gag order on myself in terms of talking about the past. I’ve got to slam the door and deal with the present and the future.