Alexander Graham Bell brought us the telephone. He owns the telephones in the buildings. Thomas Edison owns the lightbulb. Whether they took it and did things to improve it, he’s the guy. Now on the dance floor, that belongs to Chubby Checker.
I’m not good at anything except writing jokes. I wasn’t good at sports, I wasn’t good at anything artsy, ever. I think there was a real worry for a while about what I would be good at. I was just this chubby little Indian kid who looked like a nerd.
It certainly would have been adaptive for ancestral man to have a chubby wife during stressful times of famine. Not only would she have had more calories to burn, and thus more energy and endurance, but since fat stores estrogen, she would have remained fertile for longer.
I was fat when I was a kid. I was a little chunkier, but that’s boring because everyone was fat when they were a kid, right? Didn’t we all go through a chubby stage? Mine maybe lasted a little longer – mine went until, like, the end of high school.
Jerry Springer’ is just kind of the chubby, redneck version of throwing Christians to the lions.
Pages: 1 2
