Marriage is no longer the only place where people make major life transitions and decisions, enter into commitments, or incur obligations.
Marriage is generally based on more equality and deeper friendship than in the past, but even so, it is hard for it to compensate for the way that work has devoured time once spent cultivating friendships.
Nostalgia is a very human trait.
The origins of modern marital instability lie largely in the triumph of what many people believe to be marriage’s traditional role – providing love, intimacy, fidelity, and mutual fulfillment. The truth is that for centuries, marriage was stable precisely because it was not expected to provide such benefits.
If the ascent of women has been much exaggerated, so has the descent of men.
Social changes always involve trade-offs.
It is ironic that so many politicians claim to defend traditional Christian values of ‘faith and family.’ In fact, a radical antifamily ideology permeates Christ’s teaching, and the early Christian tradition often set faith and family against each other.
As time passes, the actual complexity of our history – even of our own personal experience – gets buried under the weight of the ideal image.
Liberal politicians, in celebrating the benefits of modernization, free trade, diverse families, and the rise of more women and minorities into political and economic prominence, have often glossed over the pain of white blue-collar communities.
We must recognize that there are healthy as well as unhealthy ways to be single or to be divorced, just as there are healthy and unhealthy ways to be married.
Educated parents find more time to spend with their children by reducing time dedicated to home-based activities that involve little interaction with children.
Second marriages can and do create ‘real’ families.
If we want to revive and achieve the American Dream, we need to change a situation in which the people whose hard work makes this country run cannot earn a living wage, while bankers, speculators, and corporate elites – the real ‘takers’ in today’s society – skim off far more than their fair share.
Throughout history, people with few educational or economic resources and little bargaining power have often looked to authoritarian, ruthless people to stand up for them.
Over the ages, some societies have accorded far less value and respect to singles than to married individuals.
Marriage can provide a bounty of emotional, practical, and financial support. But finding the right mate is no substitute for having friends and other interests.
Contrary to myth, ‘The Feminine Mystique’ and feminism did not represent the beginning of the decline of the stay-at-home mother but a turning point that led to much stronger legal rights and ‘working conditions’ for her.
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