Top 120 Kidding Quotes

There were rumors I wasn’t going to die. The whole cast was sitting around the table reading the script. I fell on the floor – I’m not kidding. I looked up at Katherine Heigl, and she was crying.

I don’t know why my lines that were cut from the film didn’t make it onto the DVD. I have offered to go into the editing room with Christopher and work shoulder to shoulder with him to fit all my lines in. I think he thinks I’m kidding. I’m only trying to help.

It’s honestly every time that I’m doing something, and every time I visit a station and hear my song on the radio and people buying my stuff, I’m like ‘Are you kidding me? This is insane!’

They were saying, ‘Keep this under your hat, but Jack Sparrow’s going to die in the second movie.’ I went, ‘You’re kidding me. The fans are going to go berserk.’

In our industry, everything is taken lightly. Guys say so many things, and if you react to them, they go, like,’We are kidding.’ Things like ‘You are looking hot sexy’ are common.

If someone gets into the Super Bowl, should they stop trying to get back into the Super Bowl? You gotta be kidding me.

I was doing a scene in a medical tent in 18th-century battle dress, pantaloons and a ripped shirt, and the guy from the crew kept asking me if I was OK, if I was too cold. I told him, ‘Are you kidding? I’m from Wales!’

My journey was never hard; it just happened. From the second I held a knife, from the second I was in culinary school, it’s all felt too good to be true. ‘This cannot be my job, my life. Somebody has to be kidding with me!’

My next project is to get back to that. Actually, to learn how to write poetry. I’m not kidding.

You know, actors lie all the time. ‘Can I ride on the horse? Are you kidding? Of course! I was born on a horse!’… It’s the same with motorcycles.

It’s so nice to run into people even now who – if I’m out, a couple of times a week, somebody comes up to me and says, ‘I just loved you in ’50 First Dates.’ That movie is my favorite movie. I just watched it last night.’ In my head, I’m always thinking, ‘You’re kidding me. I never watch anything twice.’

I’d love to be coaching kids three or four years. You kidding me? That’s what I used to do.

People who drive slow in the left lane on the highway! Are you kidding me? Don’t you see everybody passing you, honking and flipping you off? It’s not because everyone else is crazy, it’s because you’re driving slow in the fast lane, you jerk! OMG! It makes me crazy!

Sometimes I am so dry that people don’t know I’m kidding and think I’m being serious. I enjoy this because their reactions are often funny.

I was conveniently bisexual for a long time, and then I went, ‘Come on, who am I kidding?’ And I have to say, it was the single biggest step I took toward emotional well-being, to stop feeling like I had to hide who I am.

I’m at an age where crying is easier for me now. I like it. I can cry at a poignant commercial; I can cry at a – this is a running joke in my house, but… a good ‘Star-Spangled Banner’ can make me cry. I’m not kidding.

I’m happy to be here. I’m happy to be anywhere. I’m not kidding.

Bike lanes are the coolest. My favorite past time is flipping off cars from my bicycle. Just kidding – I’m more of a silent resentment kind of girl.

When people are coming to Krakow and we show them how and where we practice, they are like, ‘Seriously? Are you kidding me?’ But we’re always saying that what matters about the courts – the lines, the nets – are the same. I’m practicing in Poland even when I don’t have good facilities.

Sometimes if I tell people, ‘I’m afraid that I’m really a fraud,’ or ‘I have a lot of self-doubt,’ they go, ‘Oh, no, you’re kidding.’ I go, ‘No, I’m really honest.’

My friends are very rich. Elizabeth Taylor sends flowers the size of the bathtub. I’m not kidding.

I try to break a sweat every day doing something. Try to do hot pilates once a week. I’m not kidding. I actually hurt myself doing hot pilates, so I got that going for me.

I talk to people who are musicians, and they go, Oh this is hell. And I go, Are you kidding me? You never put tar paper on a roof, did ya?

The money never mattered. I’m not kidding you. It hasn’t really brought me any kind of happiness.

I’d love to teach Roman Reigns how to work. Just kidding.

Teasing is often healthy and fun, not to mention an important part of interpersonal and individual development. But when it’s abused, ‘just kidding’ contains a disturbing logic: If I didn’t mean it, it didn’t happen.

President Obama has decided to have the United Nations review the law of Arizona. You have got to be kidding! We’re now going to have countries like Cuba, Libya and Uganda sitting in judgment on Arizona’s laws? Enough is enough!

No kidding. That’s really true. You’re paying your own bills through this. It’s not a pleasant experience.

I really feel like I have the potential – and I’m not even kidding about it – I have the potential to be the best player in the league.

How many straight men maintain inappropriately intimate relationships with their mothers? How many shop with them? I want a gay son. People laugh, but they assume I’m kidding. I’m not.

When you go to vacuum in the airlock and you take the hose off the front of your space suit, there’s a little bit of water in there, and you can see that sublimate and ice crystals form and fly away. My thought at that moment was, ‘Oh, we are not kidding at vacuum here; we are really in space.’

Violence – look, we live in a violent world, man. This country was founded on violence. Who’s kidding who?

I never feel like I’ve done anything. Swear to God. I’m not kidding. So it’s always a surprise when somebody asks me to do anything.

Just kidding, I’ve been very athletic all my life.

Any time you’re in front of a camera and have them yell ‘Cut, re-shoot the scene,’ are you kidding me? That’s a huge advantage.

One night I went over to get some dope from some Hollywood tough guy. After I left, my son Scott, who was only fifteen, went over with a baseball bat to kill him. I was laughing out of one eye and crying out of the other. I thought, Who am I kidding?

During the writer’s strike I was walking a line and ran into Jack Black and he said, ‘We’re doing Airborne 2!’, and I asked, ‘Are you kidding?’, and he said, ‘Yeah.’ I like ‘Airborne,’ its very pure.

I’ll be Spider-Man. I’m just kidding, I love Tom Holland.

People are going to take shots at you for everything you did bad, and they forget about all the good things you did. They do it to everyone. They’re going to do it to me, they’ve done it to all of them. They did it to Tom Landry. Are you kidding me? Tom Landry? With the fedora? Come on. They did it to Tom Landry.

I want to play James Bond – are you kidding me? I’m putting my name in the ring!

Bagpipes is a woodwind instrument, so you have to warm it up. But in a wrestling dressing room? You’ve got to be kidding me.

Graham Norton makes me laugh. I love him. I’m not kidding. I watch him on BBC America every week. He’s so fast.

I was a mime. I’m not kidding. I went to Northwestern University and they have a mime company, so we did a lot of training and then a lot of mime shows around Chicago.

I’m not kidding – once you discover the pleasure of giving, how gratifying and satisfying it is, it becomes addictive.

When I first started going to Portland, people told me about Stumptown. They were like ‘Oh, it’s the best coffee,’ and I thought, ‘How good could it really be?’ I’m like, ‘Sure, great, uh… I’d love to see it.’ But then when I went, it truly, I am not kidding, is the best coffee I have ever had.

Those who have succeeded at anything and don’t mention luck are kidding themselves.

Well, it’s a little harder in New York. It’s not as forgiving to a film crew. You hold up a bunch of New Yorkers who can’t cross the street, they’re not going to take it well. Southern California? They’ll wait. It’s cool man. In New York, they’re like, ‘Are you kidding me? I gotta get to work.’

Marvin Gaye was a friend of mine, and he used to say, ‘Man, I wish I could sing like you – if I could have that growl in my voice.’ And I said, ‘Man, are you kidding me? I want to sing like you. Everybody wants to sing like you.’

I became interested in ‘Smallville’ when ‘Aquaman’ was not picked up and my mortgage was due. Kidding. The real reason is that it was an easy decision.

People will come up to me and try and be secretive and say, ‘Can you do the Gollum voice for me?’ And I’m like, ‘Are you kidding? It’s 8:30 in the morning on the Victoria Line.’

The best part of being an angel investor is seeing these kids coming up with companies that get way more traffic than Reddit had when we sold it. I think, ‘Are you kidding me? They’re just kids, and they’ve done so much.’

I remember, my first bicycle was very much a used bike. I wasn’t going to Wal-Mart, buying a flashy 10-speed bike from China. Are you kidding me?

Trump in particular was such an unpopular candidate, because he’s so anti communities of color, and we’re a minority majority state, are you kidding?

When I say I’m famous, I’m not kidding myself. I know my place in the celebrity kingdom – right at the bottom next to reality-show contestants, local politicians, and day-players on ‘Law & Order.’