Words matter. These are the best Johnny Carson Quotes, and they’re great for sharing with your friends.
People will pay more to be entertained than educated.
The only thing money gives you is the freedom of not worrying about money.
I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing.
If it weren’t for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we’d still be eating frozen radio dinners.
Never use a big word when a little filthy one will do.
To be an entertainer, you gotta be a little gutsy, a little egotistical, so you have to pull back sometimes when people say, ‘Well, he’s stuck-up.’ ‘Stuck-up’ is only another word for self-conscious.
I was going to hang it up on the twenty-fifth year of this show. I don’t know why. Maybe twenty-five years is enough. And I found out that I was having so much fun doing the show that we decided to stick around for a while.
Never continue in a job you don’t enjoy. If you’re happy in what you’re doing, you’ll like yourself, you’ll have inner peace. And if you have that, along with physical health, you will have had more success than you could possibly have imagined.
Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn’t grow up can be vice president.
If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.
Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.
People thought I was funny, so I kind of took entertaining for granted… it was inevitable that I’d start giving little performances.
Talent alone won’t make you a success. Neither will being in the right place at the right time, unless you are ready. The most important question is: ‘Are your ready?’
I know you’ve been married to the same woman for 69 years. That is marvelous. It must be very inexpensive.
If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.
Never use a big word when a little filthy one will do.
Never continue in a job you don’t enjoy. If you’re happy in what you’re doing, you’ll like yourself, you’ll have inner peace. And if you have that, along with physical health, you will have had more success than you could possibly have imagined.
My success just evolved from working hard at the business at hand each day.
Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.
The mind starts to do things that you didn’t even realize it could do. I suppose it’s the manipulation. I suppose it’s the sense of power, the center of attention, and the me-ism. And performers have to have that.
Happiness is your dentist telling you it won’t hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill.
The mind starts to do things that you didn’t even realize it could do. I suppose it’s the manipulation. I suppose it’s the sense of power, the center of attention, and the me-ism. And performers have to have that.
I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself.
To be an entertainer, you gotta be a little gutsy, a little egotistical, so you have to pull back sometimes when people say, ‘Well, he’s stuck-up.’ ‘Stuck-up’ is only another word for self-conscious.
If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.
