Words matter. These are the best David Walliams Quotes, and they’re great for sharing with your friends.
I don’t get recognized much, and am very happy with that. The fans I have met have all been delightful.
The most used piece of kit in my kitchen is my saucepan. I use it every morning to cook my porridge in. The least used piece of equipment? I’d say a food mixer. I’ve never used it, I don’t really know what they’re for.
I love telling stories. I love the intimacy between the writer and reader. When you write sketches it’s over in two minutes. When you write a book the characters have to have a bit of emotional depth.
I’ve noticed that once you leave London you do kind of become a bit more famous. People in London are a bit too cool for school. It’s not so unusual to see someone from London in the street. But outside of London people are a bit more excited to see you and come out and support you.
I don’t have a fear factor. Well, not much of one. And I’m willing to risk quite a lot – as a comedian, you’re always risking a lot. You’re risking failure, especially if you’re improvising and going on TV shows trying to make comedy out of thin air. That is quite a risky business.
There’s something about being a comedian that means you have to not be scared of failing because failing is part of the process.
I thrive off the company of others, I love being sociable.
I’m terribly attention-seeking. It’s very different once you get all this attention, though. Because then you want to control it. And you can’t exactly.
TV has lost a lot of its self-confidence as its power has been eroded by the internet.
When I was a child I devoured every book I could get my hands on. I loved losing myself in colourful and dramatic stories – and my absolute favourite was ‘Charlie And The Chocolate Factory.’ Everything about it electrified me, and when I re-read Roald Dahl’s books as an adult it surprised me.
Social satire has been around since people have been around.
Children’s books are often seen as the poor relation of literature. But children are just as demanding as adult readers, if not more so. I should know. I’m a children’s writer myself.
I have a pathological fear of being on my own. When I’m with my own thoughts, I start to unravel myself, and I start to think really dark thoughts, self-destructive thoughts.
The one good thing about our school was the Cadets; I chose to be in the Navy, purely for the sailor’s outfit. A pity we had to give them back.
Reality always outstrips fiction. Whatever you make up, something more incredible always pops up in real life.
We sort of expect to see men in women’s clothes. It’s part of our culture. The key thing is, it has to be done quite badly.
I’ve done panel shows, which I enjoy, and on those you’re recording half-an-hour of TV and sometimes they film for two hours. But with ‘Britain’s Got Talent,’ you’re on camera for eight hours, with a large theatre audience watching – and in between you’re being filmed for ITV2 as you eat your lunch.
I don’t know what I’ll be like when I’m 60. I already have the traits of a retired gentleman.
Ricky Gervais would have you believe otherwise, but Sacha Baron Cohen is the most successful British comedian in the world.
All human life can be found in an airport.
Sometimes you meet people who can’t swim. And I always think: ‘Oh my God, that’s extraordinary.’ For me, it’s always been a treat… I just feel really happy in the water.
I just want to be happy, have kids, enjoy my life, help others and create some good work.
I know somebody from university who’s called Phil Collins, and I think there’s something terribly unfortunate about sharing a name with somebody who either is famous or becomes famous.
I was depressed as a child. I found it hard to make friends. My favourite thing was locking myself in the bathroom and practising comedy routines.
I still enjoy my life, and I feel like I’ve achieved enough things that if I never did anything again, I’d feel confident that I’d still have made my mark in some way. But maybe the self-loathing bit is the element that makes you strive for more. Makes you strive to be better.
It’s important when you’re married not to forget those things you used to do when you were trying to get her to marry you. You can’t send flowers and buy gifts then, when you’re married, say, ‘Right, get my tea on’. That doesn’t go down well. So you’ve got to keep that level of interest going.
We sit in a room for months trying to think of funny things.
There’s a sort of magic and music to comedy. Some words, some numbers even, are funnier than others. A Caramac bar, for instance, is funnier than a Milky Way.
I know some of my parents’ friends think ‘Little Britain’ is in incredibly poor taste. But swimming the Channel? You can’t really say anything negative about that, can you? There’s nothing better than making your parents happy. The glee on my father’s face that day was amazing.
Definitely I love women, I love being around women, I find them incredible and intoxicating, and I’ve never had that feeling I get with women with a man.
It’s easier not to make a particular joke in case it offends. But every joke will offend someone, and I’ve always believed that the audience is bigger than one person. The danger is that things will become bland.
I would recommend that anyone who wants to do comedy on TV to do radio first.
I was born in 1971, and Tom Baker was sort of my obsession as a kid and that’s why we got him to do the voice over for ‘Little Britain’ because I was actually obsessed with Tom Baker.
I don’t have a lot to share with other men. My heart sinks when I get into a taxi and someone starts talking to me about football.
I have always liked shows that have laughter in them.