I always joke that I’m a British actress trying to break into Scandinavian TV.
I tend to have a lot of jokes about ex-girlfriends. They always ask me if they will be the subject of a joke, and I always tell them they won’t. Unless they do something crazy. They all tend to, so you know where that goes. There are no closed doors. The ‘art’ will suffer.
I thought it was a joke at first, but the president did, in fact, authorize an autopen to sign the Patriot Act extension into law. Consider the dangerous precedent this sets. Any number of circumstances could arise in the future where the public could question whether or not the president authorized the use of an autopen.
The Giants beating the undefeated Patriots, that’s all a joke. The star of a reality show is going to run the country. The guy who decided if Bret Michaels or Cyndi Lauper would make a better CEO for a company that doesn’t exist is going to be running stuff.
The whole westward expansion myth is seen as romantic. But it’s a joke, a blot on American history.
A lot of times, you could play me just the laughs from my set, and I could tell you, from the laugh, what the joke was. Because they match.
I think sometimes in comedy the characters are often sacrificed for the joke, and it’s more important for it to be funny than for there to be love.
In almost every interview someone asks what does HIM stand for. I can’t even remember our latest lie about that. When Hanson was hot, we said it means Hanson Is Murder. The name doesn’t have a particular history. His Infernal Majesty was a totally different band. I think HIM derives from some death metal joke.
I often joke that 100 years from now I hope people are saying, ‘Dang, she looks good for her age!’
Whatever happened to a good pie-in-the-face joke?
My joke used to be about my father and Peter Boyle: that anything you see Peter Boyle do on TV, my father has done in real life without pants on.
A good joke can spread throughout the Internet between the time you go to bed and the time you wake up, leading to an inbox filled with pictures of funny cats and cheeseburgers.
As we all know, Aquaman is somewhat the butt of the joke in the superhero world.
To go from Girl, Interrupted, where I had to cry every day, to a TV show like West Wing where I get to laugh and joke around every day, has been a welcome relief.
If you write a novel where war is nothing but hell and no one experiences excitement or cracks a dark joke, then you’re not actually admitting the full experience.
Why is Cloud 9 so amazing? What is wrong with Cloud 8? That joke came off the top of my head, and the top of my head ain’t funny!
I’m a bit of a worrier, to an extreme. I’ll crack a joke, then worry if I’ve offended someone – even when they’re laughing. I have a guilt complex, always worrying.
I was at Facebook in 2012, during the previous presidential race. The fact that Facebook could easily throw the election by selectively showing a Get Out the Vote reminder in certain counties of a swing state, for example, was a running joke.
The critics had an image of me, and they wouldn’t accept any other… I was a cartoon character. A joke.
The old joke was Mitch Leigh, land baron, barren land.
Watching movies in the U.S. is great fun because they get every joke, they smile, they laugh so much; it’s a great feeling.
I love musical theater so much. When done right, I think comedy songs can be the most efficient form of joke delivery. Songs can be the most efficient and the best forms of conveying emotion. Music is universal. It’s worldwide.
The key to gallows humor is to make the joke, no matter how certain the gallows is.
I mean, I’ve had bartenders and waiters and waitresses make a comment about a joke of mine, like pointing out some sort of logic error or something that I’ve never even thought about, and they’re right.
I make funny videos. I hate saying I’m a comedian because then people stick their finger in your face and demand you tell a joke. But the other thing people call me is ‘a YouTube sensation,’ which is even worse.
When I tell a joke, I immediately know whether it’s funny or not.
Often women are pitted against each other for an easy joke, so they fight or steal each other’s boyfriends. That’s not really true to life.
Richard Lewis is the master at taking a joke that he’s told a million times in a row in the past year, on the road, and making it look like he’s pulling it out of thin air.
’30 Rock’ is probably one of my favorite shows. It’s just joke after joke after joke.
Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?
Cooking allows you to have travels, adventures and journeys without going anywhere. The running joke between my partner and me is that I’m not really concerned about how long it takes, or how much I destroy the kitchen, because I just have such a good time doing it.
Some people, they just don’t get a joke.
At university level, I had an economics lecturer who used to joke that I was the only student who handed in essays on British Airways notepaper.
I used to joke that I wanted to go to the moon, but I actually do. Like, some day I think I’m going to go to the moon. That would be cool.
The running joke about the Premio Cervantes, the most coveted literary prize in the Spanish-speaking world, which was established by Spain’s Ministry of Culture in 1976, is that Cervantes himself wouldn’t have received it. This is because he was, in his heart, the most anti-Spanish of Spanish writers.
There was no joke I could make that was too offensive. I can actually remember at least one time where my mother told me something that, I was like, ‘whoa!’
I was making my living from a joke about my appearance that I didn’t understand, and in a way still don’t, because when I look in a mirror it doesn’t seem funny to me.
I always made the joke that I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall when Warner Brothers first put ‘Tusk’ on and listened to it in their boardroom as a follow-up to ‘Rumours.’
The U.K. and Europe in general seem to be a lot more patient. The U.S. are expecting ‘joke joke joke joke joke joke joke.’ They don’t actually sit and listen to you.
I always make the joke that I go home, to one of my homes, to go and do laundry so I can go on the road again.
I typically start out almost every speech I give making some kind of joke about me being in a wheelchair.
The Pakistan Cricket Board is a long-standing joke, its chairmen replaced with every change of government.
Kanye’s the best listener I’ve ever worked with. If I interrupt Kanye, every single time, he’ll wait for me to finish before speaking. It’s a running joke – sometimes I interrupt him just to see. And he always goes, ‘No, no, finish. I want to hear what you have to say.’
Like every comedian, if I heard a joke that I thought would work, I used it.
Advice is sometimes transmitted more successfully through a joke than grave teaching.
Completely committed to adapting ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’. This is not a joke. Christian Grey and Ana: potentially great cinematic characters.
I remember I would always joke among my friends about a remake of ‘Point Break’. I would say, ‘You know what? Whenever there’s a remake of ‘Point Break’, I’m going to do it.’
I have had every hair color. I joke with my hair colorist. She keeps sheets of paper on every hair color that I’ve had, so she has records of it all. She’s done my hair since I was 15, and I guess I have a thick folder going because I’ve had so many different hair colors.
Venom was a joke in the ’80s, their heavy metal music sucked big time, and I really have no interest in them – not then, not now.
I have Bob Dylan lyrics on my ribs. I’m a diehard Dylan fan, and my dad and I joke that if I ever met him, I’d have him sign his name right under my tattoo and then I’d run to the parlor to get his signature tattooed.
We joke about it in the entertainment industry: Every actor wants to be a musician, and every musician wants to be an actor.
If you take away scale, the nature of the story changes. I made a joke the other day: if I were to try to make ‘Glory’ now, rather than be about a regiment, it would be about a platoon. It would be seven men in the woods rather than all the men on the beach.
My friends always joke that I run on batteries.
I’m a taker in terms of jokes. I love to hear a good joke, but I don’t retain jokes. I’m not a good teller of jokes.
Most shows find themselves descending into sentimentality or earnestness at some point but, with ‘Community,’ the joke is always on.
My friends are people who like building cool stuff. We always have this joke about people who want to just start companies without making something valuable. There’s a lot of that in Silicon Valley.
I am a super-confident writer, and as a joke writer and as an actress, I’m like, ‘I want to go head-to-head with every person.’ I am an Indian woman and I’m a kind of double minority in this world.
Scandinavian-Danish cuisine was something quite rustic, mostly known for pastries and smorgasbord cuisine, which in itself has become a joke.
I love people who have a good sense of humor, tell a good story, tell a good joke.
I sometimes joke – but the joke is not so wrong – that after my time in East Germany, I could either afford therapy to work through what happened under the Communists or move to New York.
